Thursday, October 09, 2008

"Those who doubt me suck cock by choice!"

I love my husband Ian for a lot of things. First, I can trust him. Simple as that. I've known him well over 10 years and I'd trust him with my child's life, as well as my own. I trust him to be honest with me. And in the honesty lies love for me I still can't wrap my brain around sometimes.

Currently I feel like a right wreck. I finally "manned up", so to speak, and went to the clinic, where I wound up waiting 3 hours for the doctor to tell me I have a bad cold and prescribe prescription strenth Sudafed. Wow. Really? It cost $80 too because I'm employed and make to much money. I didn't lie about my income because they want proof of your income. I did tell the consultant that I was going to go quit my job now so I could qualify for free medical assistance. She chuckled.

But I'm feeling like a wreck because of this cold that's taking for-fucking-ever to go away (I'm not usually this sick for this long, or so I think), and I hate my job, and now my lower back is hurting a lot and my aunt flo's in town. I feel the best solution would be to step in front of a bus. My luck I'd get maimed slightly but not qualify for disability because I'm too tall or my hair's too red.

And I keep pissing and moaning about my job to Ian. He's taking it in stride and being very supportive, from wanting to cut someone on my behalf or just eloquently stating the obvious. I love and appreciate his patience with me because I can be such a random bitch to him. He really keeps me sane most days, which must take a toll on his own sanity. I got the following email from him the other day and it really saved my soul.

Darling, i think the reason you sometimes feel down on yourself is because of all the bullshit you pick up on from all the other cocksuckers around you. Now, i'm not one who ascribes to a particular belief system, but you are incredible sensitive person(not the cry all the type sensitive) who, like it or not, picks up on the vibes(emotional, psychic, whatever) that people put out and because most people are vicious selfcentered, self-hating, repressive dickcheese eating monsters, you pick that up and not being that type of person, you don't have the ability to reflect it back at them. It's not a shortcoming on your part, it's a gift that, in addition to having a downside, it also allows you to instinctively know how to be comfortable and friendly and loving with a wide range of personalities and is one of the things that attracted me to you. I don't mean to vent but i want you to know that i get what you feel, as best i can, and that i'm here to help you however i can(even if it means shutting up for a bit if i get a bit vociferous).Now start heading home and i'll see you soon, Sugarlips.MWAAAH!

3 comments:

Sizzle said...

It's great that you have each other and Ian can be so supportive during this very taxing, trying, annoying time for you. Also, that he uses words like vociferous in an email. That's awesome.

Hope things change for you!

kerrianne.org said...

Rad husbands are the best. I feel thankful to have one, too.

(It was so great to spend some time today! We'll have to do it again! And anytime you are in Portland, give me a shout, fo sho.)

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